TLR Chapter 59

Hearing the sound of hoof beats Shorty walked out to the corral and opened the gate for the horses.  He gave Bo a look as the guests dismounted. The older man helped brush and water the horses before leading the younger man back into the bunkhouse for lunch.

"I think we have something to tend to before the next group gets here." Shorty said in a quiet tone.

Bo swallowed hard. He'd hoped that Shorty would have forgotten by now.  "Yes sir."

Once back at the bunkhouse, Shorty rousted the twins then he and Bo prepared lunch for all four of them.  Not much was said in the kitchen.  The twins stood at the counter eating, too sore to sit on the chairs. Both young men stood touching each for comfort.

All through lunch Bo had watched the twins.  He missed the banter that usually accompanied any meal they shared. 

After the lunch dishes were cleaned up Shorty sent the twins to the stables to get the next bunch of horses really for the 2 o'clock ride.

Bo wasn’t sure what Shorty was going to do.  He knew he had been wrong and deserved to get the same as the twins had gotten but could he bring his self to tell Shorty that?

Bo took one look at Shorty's face and swallowed a hard lump in his throat.  "I'm sorry about what happened, Shorty. I knew I should have called you but I was sure we'd find Troy and get him back to the resort before anyone found out he'd gone.  Especially on Taz.  We all know how you are about letting only the most experienced riders take him out.  We never thought for a minute that he would go off the trail and get so far from the resort."

Shorty leaned against the counter across the table from where Bo sat.  He crossed his arms.  "So, if you had found Troy and gotten back before anyone noticed would you have told me?

Bo hesitated for a moment.  "Well, yes, I'm sure we would have told you." He replied unconvincingly. "I was more worried about the twins than anything else." He added.  "Jarrod said that Little Jake was beside himself."

Bo became more nervous the longer Shorty remained silent.  He quailed under the man's gaze.

"Well, thank you for watching out for them, those boys mean the world to me,” Shorty said.  "And even if you hadn't have told me, I would have found out because the twins aren't good with guilt."  The big man dropped his hands to rest on the counter on either side of him.  "But the fact remains that you are the one in charge here.  It is your responsibility to notify me went there is a problem."

"I'm sorry, Shorty, really." Bo replied contritely, and a little nervously.  "I was going to call you once we got back.  I wasn't expecting this to be an overnight trip.  I'm sorry I worried you."

Shorty's eyes softened.  He could see the Bo was sincere.  "Bo, you are new here.  And I know the Jarrod can be quite convincing when he wants to be."  Shorty paused letting his eyes rest on Bo. 

Bo felt his cheeks getting hot.  It was true, Jarrod was very convincing when he wanted to be, but Bo knew that Shorty was right and that he should have called him immediately when he knew there was a problem.

"I won't let it happen again, Shorty." Bo said quietly.

Shorty pulled his chair out and sat down at the table with Bo, "No, I don't think you will Bo.  But I have to wonder if simply saying you're sorry will be enough?"

Bo looked at Shorty nervously, he worried where this conversation was going.  "I... I mean it, Shorty. I... what do you want me to say?" he asked. He still couldn't bring himself to admit that he deserved whatever the twins had gotten.

"I don't want you to say anything now, Bo."  Shorty answered.  "But I do want you to give some thought to it while you're out with that last group." He reached out and put his hand over Bo's.  Both men pulled back, both feeling the jolt that passed between them.

Bo looked at Shorty uncertainly, and felt his whole body tingling.  His heart rate sped up and he couldn't seem to take his eyes off of Shorty's. It wasn't the first time he'd felt that surge between them, and he had to admit to himself that he didn't find it unpleasant.

Coming to himself he licked his lips nervously.  "I promise, I'll think about it.  It's all I've been doing all morning." He admitted.

Bo's arm was still on the table so Shorty, reached across taking the horse wranglers hand in his.  He smiled.  "I know you have been, Bo.  I know it's eating at you too." He squeezed the hand in his.  "You know if you were mine, I could help you with that guilt."

"You... you could? Like you do... with the twins?"

"Yes, like I do with the twins, but," Shorty paused, "but maybe for a different reason."

"A different reason?" Bo asked uncertainly.

"The twins are like sons to me, Bo." the vet answered.  "You're a little too old to be my son, but I have this overwhelming urge to help and protect you."

Bo swallowed again now for a different reason. He'd been attracted to the vet since he'd met him, and he understood what TLR was about having learned about it during his orientation.  Could Shorty be saying what he thought?

"You want to... protect me?"  Bo asked, a hint of another question on the tip of his tongue.  He wouldn't ask, just in case Shorty had meant something entirely different.

"I want more than that Bo, but I don't want to scare you off.” Shorty admitted.

Bo blushed slightly, hoping against hope that Shorty was saying what he'd been hoping for since he'd arrived at the resort.  "I'm not scared." He said quietly.

Shorty grinned, "I hoped you wouldn't be."  He squeeze Bo's hand again.  "We have a lot to talk about, little boy."

Bo smiled shyly back.  "I'm looking forward to it." he replied.

"But first we need to deal with yesterday.  I want you to really give those events some thought, Bo." Shorty instructed. 

"Yes, sir. I will. I'm sorry."

"Bo, no matter what decision you make I still want us to become more than friends." The big man stood then leaned over to place a tinder kiss on Bo's lips.  "If that's what you want."

Bo smiled back, shy and pleased and honestly thrilled at the thought of he and Shorty being more than just coworkers and friends.  "I... I... like that idea.  We can talk more when I get back, like you said.  Ok?"

"Yes, we can and will talk, Bo," Shorty answered with a grin.  "We have a lot to talk about remember."

"Yes, sir." Bo replied quietly.  "Well, I'd better get going now.  The next group will be here soon... don't wanna keep them waiting."

He left the bunkhouse in something of a dream state and came to when he saw the impatient group already outside and waiting for him.

<<<<>>>> 

"So what do you have to say for yourself, little boy?" Jeff asked once they'd gotten inside their bungalow.  The two of them sat on the couch, ready to begin their discussion.

"What would you do without me?" Mutt answered as he sat back in a surprisingly casual manner.

Jeff, taken aback by the somewhat flippant remark, raised an eyebrow and waited for Mutt to elaborate.

"Look at it this way," Mutt continued, leaning forward slightly with his hands palm up on his knees.  "If we brats had no vices, what would you Tops have to do with your lives? Nothing, that's what! And then we'd have a world filled with sad, weepy Tops, doped to the gills on antidepressants, walking around like zombies, and not in the cool, Hollywood way."

That made both of Jeff's eyebrows almost disappear into his hairline. But before he could respond, Mutt went on.

"So in truth, we keep Tops happy by breaking the rules.  So I ask again, what would you do without me?  I keep you happy, and I give your life purpose that you wouldn't have if I didn't break the occasional rule."

Jeff put an arm around Mutt's shoulders and ran it down to the small of his husband's back.

"Who can argue with logic like that?" He asked, watching as Mutt smiled triumphantly.  

The smile of triumph vanished when Jeff pulled Mutt across his knees and began to smack his backside with the heavy, antique hairbrush that he'd stuck between the couch cushions

.

"Hey!" Mutt began to argue until Jeff increased the force and velocity of the swats. He knew he didn't dare put a hand back at that point so he grabbed onto the edge of the seat cushion for dear life.

"Well what do you know?" Jeff asked conversationally as Mutt wriggled and hissed beneath the pounding of the hairbrush.  "I don't feel the least bit sad or weepy now.  You're right!  What would I do without you?"

<<<<>>>> 

Bo returned with a very happy group of amateur riders two hours later.  He whistled and the twins came out of the stables like identical sentinels and helped the guests down from their mounts.  After they'd said their goodbyes, Bo went into the stables with the boys and they began to unsaddle and brush the horses.  The twins had already made sure that the stalls were clean and that food and water were ready once their duty to the horses was done.

Bo cleared his throat several times, trying to figure out how to approach the topic that was on his mind.  The boys might consider it to be too personal to talk about and he didn't know if they might become offended or defensive.

Finally he just decided to ask straight out. He took a deep breath and looked at Jarrod.

"Jare, I need to ask you a personal question, is that alright?"

Jarrod shrugged, looked at his brother and replied, "Sure, I guess so."

"Well, Shorty said... I mean... he wants to... to me and... I mean..." he trailed off, flustered.

"You wanna know why we let him spank us?" Little Jake asked.

"Why we allow it?" Jare finished for him.

"Because he brought up the subject with you."

"And you want our input." Jare said.

"Well, yeah.  I mean... I've never... at least not since I was a kid, younger than you guys."

"He does it because he loves us, and cares for us like sons." Jare replied with an understanding smile.

"And we allow it because we know we need it... deserve it actually. Sometimes." Little Jake added.

Shorty had heard Bo return from the last ride of the day.  He watched for a few minutes as the guests headed back to their bungalows or the lodge.  After another half hour Shorty's lack of patience got the better of him and he walked over to the stables to bring Bo back to the bunkhouse.  The twins could finish with the horses while he talked to the young man.  Shorty heard talking and stopped just outside the side door.  He smiled at the words he heard coming from the twins.

"Our own dad was hell on us.  He liked to use the belt." Jare continued.  "Shorty helped us to see that discipline didn't have to be harsh.  He's more of a dad to us than our own ever was."

"And we allow it because we know he loves us, and just wants what's best for us.  And if a whack across the backside now and again is what it takes to make us straighten out our act, then that's what we get."  Little Jake added.

"And we respect him.  And...we love him right back." Jarrod admitted.

"He doesn't spank us every time we do something wrong." Little Jake said.

Jarrod laughed, "If he did I know I'd never sit again as long as I live."

Little Jake and Bo laughed at that.

"Yeah, Shorty has said more than once that if he didn't care about us, he wouldn't do it and that he'd have had us off the resort before we could count three."

"But he sees a lot of potential in us, and he said he's not going to see that go to waste..."

"And that he'll do anything in his power to make sure we live up to that potential..."

"Even if it means warming our backsides every now and again." Jare laughed again.

"So," Jare said, sobering a little and looking up at Bo through his long lashes, "Shorty brought the subject up with you?"

Little Jake looked a little surprised but said nothing, preferring to watch quietly.

"Well, yeah," Bo admitted.  "He said... well he's right, I should have told him immediately what had happened instead of riding off with you guys... fun as it was... it wasn't very professional of me." He said a little guiltily.

"And I caused him just as much upset and worry as you guys did.  As much as I... worry about what he wants to do... I know I deserve it every bit as much as you two did.  I was just as much to blame if not more because I'm older and supposedly more responsible than you two.  I just worry about...” he trailed off again.

"How bad it's going to be?" Jare asked.

Bo nodded.  "I mean, you two couldn't even sit down for lunch..."

"We could have..." Little Jake said.

"We just didn't want to..." His brother added.

"Shorty could have insisted that we sit down no matter how much our butts stung. But he's kind hearted, and a fair man, and would never cause us more pain."  Little Jake said.

"But you were so quiet.  I thought he was still mad at us and didn't want to talk to us...that is until he had a little discussion with me."

"Nah, Shorty'll never keep a mad on." Jare said.

"He's right," Little Jake continued.  "Once it's handled it's over and done with, and in the past."

"That's one of the things we love about him."

"Yep, not like our folks who would hold things over our heads for years afterward." Little Jake said with a sound of derision.

Shorty carefully backed away from the door.  He didn't what Bo to know he had been listening. 

Jarrod rolled his eyes.  "Oh, God, yeah.  Remember when we were running and slid into the wall and knocked those glasses off the shelf? Mom never let us forget about that."

"Even though we were only about five at the time." Little Jake laughed.

"Dad was right along there with her.  That's why I'm glad I have Shorty. He's more of a dad than ours was."

"I don't want Shorty to be a dad to me though." Bo said thoughtfully.  "I had a dad and he was a good one.  I want Shorty to be... ummm, not my dad."  He faltered.

Jare huffed a laugh.  "Believe me, I don't think that Shorty has anything like fatherly feelings for you.  Not if the way he looks at you is any indication."

"The way he looks at me?" Bo asked, confused.

"You've never noticed?" Little Jake asked, surprised.

"Well we've noticed, and we've also noticed the way you look at him." The older twin winked.

Bo blushed and remained silent.  He hadn't been aware that he'd been looking at Shorty that way, but then he remembered what Shorty had said before he'd taken out the last group of riders and smiled. 

<<<<>>>> 

Ricky tried not to glare at his boy as Troy rode in with the other brats. He wanted nothing more than to haul him off the horse he was riding and haul him into the woods and switch his backside within an inch of his life, but knew from the things he had learned he needed to calm his own temper before he could deal with his brat. He had been anxious, and worried because he hadn’t been able to find him. When he learned he had taken off riding on a strange horse in a place he didn’t know very well he was furious. He took several deep breaths and schooled his face as the young man dismounted. He had seen several of the others hug their brats and so he too went up to Troy and hugged him tight. “Niño, I was worried about you. I couldn’t find you and had no idea what had happened. I love you Chico and I don’t know just what I would have done if anything had happened to you.”

Troy was surprised when he found himself engulfed in Ricky's arms tightly and found him returning the hug just as tightly. He felt a twisting in his stomach as his lover hugged him tight and said how worried he had been. It made him feel very guilty. The last thing he had wanted to do was to worry Ricky. “I love you Ricky.” He said softly.

Ricky said, “I love you too Niño.”

He helped the others get the horses and their brats all sorted out and as each couple left to go their separate ways he walked with Troy to their bungalow.

Troy had become anxious, not knowing just what Ricky was going to do. He had expected him to rant and rave at him and just start hitting him like he had done in the past, not to be pulled into a hug and told how much he was loved.

Ricky could sense the anxiety in his boy and said, “Do not worry Chico, I will not be harsh with you. That is all in the past now. You will be sore, but this time I shall discipline you with love, not abuse you in anger.”

Troy cuddled into Ricky’s side at the words and hoped they were going to be true.

When they entered the bungalow Ricky pulled Troy down with him on the sofa. “Niño, tell me what made you think it was a good idea to go riding off on a strange horse? You know better than that.” He chided quietly.

Troy blushed a little. “The guy said I couldn’t so I showed him I could.”

Ricky shook his head. “What happened next? Con said you got thrown.”

Troy licked his lips nervously.  He didn't want to admit that he'd been thrown but the secret was out, and he didn't want to get into more trouble for lying.  "Yes, I got thrown," he said quietly, "I got lost and then the horse ran off. I didn’t tell the others I was riding at the time.”

Ricky arched an eyebrow. “Are you hurt?”

Troy shook his head. “A few bruises, but nothin’ I can’t live with.”

Ricky shook his head and said, “Strip Niño, I want to see.”

Troy hesitated, then slowly stood and did as he was told.

Ricky inspected Troy. There were a few bruises on his back and shoulder, but nothing that needed the doctor’s attention. “We’ll have you bathe in Epsom salts tonight before you go to bed so you won’t be so sore.”

Troy said, “Will it help my bottom?”

Ricky shook his head. “I doubt it, but it will help these bruises.”

Troy sighed. “’Kay.”

Ricky said, “It sounds like you’re expecting a spanking.”

Troy said slightly belligerently, “That’s what you’re goin’ to do ain’t it?”

Ricky arched an eyebrow. “Is it what you deserve?”

Troy bit his lip for a moment and then nodded. “Yes.”

Ricky nodded and cuddled Troy close. “Then let’s get it over with and I want you to know I’m also grounding you for the next two days.”

“Groundin’ me?!” Troy yelped both in surprise and anger.

Ricky nodded. “Yes Chico, I think you and I need to spend some time together and since you didn’t give me today I’m taking tomorrow and the next day.” He said quietly.

Troy asked, “Why?”

Ricky kissed his forehead, “Because I love you and want you by my side for a while. We haven’t taken any classes together and I want us to.”

Troy sighed heavily, but knew Ricky was right. Mutt had said he should go to the classes and learn some things and so he decided he should do it with Ricky. “All right, I’m willin’ to do that.”

Ricky’s heart beat with happiness and he pulled Troy to him tight and kissed him soundly.

Troy cuddled into Ricky and kissed him back.

Once they finished Ricky said, “I’d love to do this all night instead of the discipline I need to give you, but we need to get this taken care of.”

Troy sighed once more and Ricky stood him up. Since he was already naked he gently pulled him across his lap and then began to spank his bare bottom soundly. He didn’t go easy on him this time and when they were through they were both exhausted.

Ricky pulled Troy down on top of him on the sofa and they both fell asleep that way.

When he woke Ricky brushed the sandy hair away from the face he loved and said gently, “Chico, wake up.”

Troy opened grainy and red rimmed eyes. “I don’t wanna.” He mumbled.

Ricky wriggled out from under his brat and scooping him up carefully carried him up to their room. He ran the warm bath and tickled the boy awake. They crawled into the bath together.

<<<<>>>> 

Shorty waited another 30 minutes before he headed to the stables again.

This time he was whistling as loud as he could.

All three men inside the stables looked guiltily toward the door and changed the subject quickly.

"Well, looks like we're all done here." Bo announced a little too loudly.

"Ayuh," Jare replied.  "I don't know about you guys but I could sure use a nice hot shower."

"Me too," Little Jake said.

Shorty stepped in to the room.  He looked and the three, "What's taking so long in here?"

All conversation stopped until Bo answered, "We were just finishing up with the horses, Shorty."

Jare led the last horse into it's stall and closed the gate.

"And we were talking about showers..." Little Jake said.

"And what's for dinner." Jarrod added.

"Jare, you and Little Jake head up to the bunkhouse, get your showers and start dinner." Shorty instructed.  "Bo and I will be there soon."

"Yes, sir." The boys answered in unison before giving Bo a look and heading toward the bunkhouse.

Bo took a breath and looked at the tall man before him.  It had been one thing to think about what was going to happen hours ago, but now that the moment was so close he became nervous again.

"Hi, Shorty." He said lamely.

Shorty chuckled, "Hi yourself, little boy.  Did you do anything while you were out?"

"Ummm, led the riders through some of the easier trails... and... I thought a lot about what you said.  About what I did.  What I should have done but didn't." He confessed quietly.

Shorty could see Bo was having a hard time but he didn't say anything, just let him talk.

"I know that I'm kind of your second in command when you're not here, and I know that the health and wellbeing of the horses and other animals on the resort are your primary concern.  I should have called you as soon as Jare told me that Troy had taken off on Taz, instead of going along with them and trying to find him, and keep what happened a secret from you.  It was wrong.  It was juvenile, I guess, and I'm really sorry."

"I would say that sums it up," the older man said.  "Have you given any thought to what we should do about it?"

Bo licked his lips nervously.  "I... I was as much to blame as the twins, if not more so.  It only seems fair that... you... ah... that you do to me what you did to them." He said in a rush sincerely hoping he wouldn't live to regret his words.

"Are you sure?" Shorty asked.  He was proud that Bo had come to this decision."

"Yes sir. As sure as I can be.  I was as much at fault as the others, and I shouldn't be treated any differently."

"I'm proud of you Bo.  Choosing the spanking shows you do take your responsibility seriously."

"Thank you... I..." Bo began, flustered.  "When... I mean, when... dang!" he said, blushing bright red as he tried to find the words.

Shorty held out his hand.  "Let's go into the tack room and get this done." He said.

Bo felt a little breathless with nerves, but he took Shorty's hand and allowed himself to be led to the back room where the tack was kept.  He stood quietly, waiting for Shorty's orders.  He'd never been spanked as an adult and he had no idea if Shorty were going to make him take his jeans down as he had with the twins or not.

He closed his eyes momentarily against the memory of one of the twins' cries as he'd been spanked the first day he'd been at the resort.  Jarrod, he thought it had been.

Shorty sat down on one of the tack boxes.  He knew from previous experience the height of the box would still allow his feet to touch the floor.  Bo wasn't much shorter than he was so the younger man would be comfortable, or as comfortable as he could be.  "Come here, Bo."

Bo did as he was told and walked over to stand before Shorty.  He bit the corner of his lip as he waited for the next order, unsure of what he was supposed to do and worrying that he was about to get it on the bare like the others.

Shorty took Bo's hand and gently pull the younger man over his lap. "Because this is the first time I've had to spank you, little boy, we'll leave your jeans on,” he revealed.

Bo wasn't sure if he was supposed to thank the bigger man, or if he was expected to say anything at all, so he remained silent as Shorty adjusted him over the broad thighs.  He took a deep breath and unconsciously held onto Shorty's leg with his free hand.

"But the next time it will be bare." The older man said following the statement with the first of several smacks to Bo's rear end.

Bo's body jerked with the first smack and he gasped at the shock of the sting.  If this was what if felt like over jeans then he vowed to himself that he'd never give Shorty a reason to spank him bare.

The hand kept falling.  Shorty planned to make this first spanking memorial.  Either Bo would run from him or run to him.  He hoped with all his heart it was the latter.

Bo tried his hardest not to wiggle, and he held his breath in an attempt not to cry, but the more Shorty spanked, the harder it became for him to avoid either.  Without realizing it, he let out the first of his sobs with an exhalation of his breath and the tears began to flow.  He was sure that Shorty would think he was not worthy now, and that made him cry harder.

Shorty finished with a volley of short crisp slaps after hearing the sobs.  He began to slowly rubbed Bo's back, cooing as he rubbed.  "It's ok, baby.  It's over now."

Bo tried to stop crying and wiped his face as well as he could with his shirt sleeve, but his tears wouldn't stop.  Would Shorty still want him after this? He was afraid to ask.  Who would want a big old cry baby as a partner, he wondered.  But oh, it felt so good to have the weight of the guilt he'd been feeling on his chest gone, and Shorty's soft tones and tenderness touched him in a way he'd never expected to feel.  Eventually his crying ceased, and the tears began to dry up although his eyes felt hot and grainy and his head hurt a little.  He wondered when Shorty was going to let him up and tell him to get lost.

Shorty waiting until the crying slowed then carefully helped Bo to his feet.  He could tell the younger man was embarrassed but he pulled him down on his lap anyway.  "Easy, babe, now comes the comfort."  He whispered as he hugged the man on his lap.

At first Bo resisted the hug, still feeling unworthy of the love and tenderness this man was showing him after what he'd done. But it felt so good to be held that soon he melted into the embrace.

"I'm so sorry, Shorty." He cried quietly.

"It’s over now, little boy, you paid the price for your actions.  Just relax and let me do this."  Shorty said as he held Bo.  "So do you still think you might want to become more that friends, Robert Daily?"

Bo wiped his face on his sleeve again, trying to avoid getting anything on Shorty, and gave a little laugh.  "Yeah.  Yes." He corrected himself, not sure if he was supposed to add a 'sir' to that.  "Yes, I do.  If you still want me?"  He asked, afraid of the answer.

"Oh, I think I've wanted you since the first time we sparked."

Bo's eyes widened a little as he looked up at Shorty.  "You felt it too?  Are you sure it wasn't just a little static electricity?" He joked, wiping his eyes again.

He felt much better now. The guilt was gone, and so was the fear that Shorty thought less of him. The embarrassment was fading into nothingness and his heart was full of love for this man who held him so gently.

"Yes, I felt it.  I even felt it just touching your jacket when you and the twins were out running around the country side looking for Troy." Shorty said.  He felt Bo start to stiffen again.  "Hey, what part of it's over and done didn't you understand?" He said kissing Bo's neck.

"Over and done?" Bo asked hopefully, thinking about the twins's story about the broken glasses and their parents never letting them forget it.

He squirmed a little when Shorty kissed him on the neck. He couldn't help but smile, hoping that Shorty would kiss him again... despite the mess his face was in at the moment.

“Over and done," Shorty repeated.   "Stand up," the bigger man gently ordered.  "We better get back to the bunkhouse before the twins burn our dinner."

Bo knew his eyes were red, and his face was puffy.  "I don't know if I can eat right now. I don't know if I can... face them... like this." Bo said hesitantly, looking up at Shorty with a plea in his eyes.

Shorty pulled Bo back out into the stables leading him to the water tap by Taz's stall.  He turned on the water and said, “Wash your face, Bo,” He let go of Bo just long to grab one the towels hanging on the wall.

"You know the twins aren’t going to judge you, so you don't have to worry." he said. “You’ve seen both of them spanked, now let's go get dinner.”

 <<<<>>>>

 The closer they got to their bungalow, the more nervous Ryan became. Coral hadn't shouted or even frowned at him, but he knew he was in trouble.

Coral opened the door and gestured Ryan in ahead of him.

Ryan bit his lip and went inside. "Corner?" He asked, now knowing what Coral meant by that.

"Corner." Coral replied shortly. "Ten minutes."

Ryan went to the corner as Coral directed. He didn't really know how long ten minutes would be but he was certain Coral would tell him.

Coral set the egg timer for ten minutes and went about making breakfast for his long lost brat. Whatever else the boy had done, or not done as the case was, he wasn't going to starve the kid, and their discussion could wait til after he had a full stomach.

Ryan could hear Coral banging around and wondered what he was doing when he heard sizzling and the odor of food drifted to him and his stomach growled. He tried not to let it be known and just shifted slightly in the corner.

By the time the bell rang the food was ready. "Come on out, sit down and eat. We can talk after breakfast."  Coral clicked his fingers to get Ryan's attention. "Sit." He repeated.

Ryan came over to the table and sat. He could tell by the way Coral was treating him that he was pretty angry with him.

"Eat." Coral said quietly.  He picked up his own fork and began to eat in silence.

Ryan picked up his fork and began to eat, but he was nervous and ate slowly and when he couldn't stand to eat anymore pushed the half eaten food away.

Coral glanced at Ryan's plate and then at Ryan. "Finish up, hon, there’s not that much left. You'll need something in your stomach after last night. I don't suppose you had much by way of breakfast before you came home either."

Ryan shook his head. "I'm sorry," he said softly, "I can't eat another bite."

Coral sympathized with the young man and put his own fork down. "Do you want to talk now?" He asked.

Ryan said, "You finish your breakfast, don't let me stop you."

"That's what microwave ovens are for." Coral replied. "We can heat this up later. I think we should go into the living room and talk. Now." he added, knowing that Ryan wouldn't be able to eat or anything else until he'd been relieved of his guilt.

When Ryan didn't respond, he pushed aside his own plate, stood, and held out his hand to the younger man.

Ryan stood and put his icy hand in Coral's.

Coral placed both hands on Ryan's to warm it up as he led the boy into the living room. He sat down and patted the place to his right, indicating that Ryan should sit down as well.

Ryan sat down next to Coral trembling a bit and stayed silent.

"Do you have anything you want to say, Ry?" Coral asked calmly. "Can you explain to me why you hurried off without your phone, without a note telling me where you'd gone, without your walkie in case you were out of cell range?  Did you even call Shorty and tell him you wouldn’t be there to feed Cas? What were you thinking when you ran off, worrying me like that?"

Ryan said, "I didn't worry you on purpose. Mutt and the others needed help and I thought since I was security I should help them.  I didn’t think we would be gone long enough to miss Cas’s feeding."

"Did it ever occur to you that you'd have helped them better and faster by reporting the incident to me? You could have called Jeff or James, you could have called Duke. You could have radioed Con and Brian to alert them to the problem. And yes, you are security, but you didn't have any means of communication if someone had been hurt, no way to tell us where you were. You didn't even bring your gun to protect yourself or the others."

Ryan ducked his head. "I guess I wasn't thinkin', pretty stupid of me huh?"

Coral sighed heavily. "You're not stupid, hon, you're impulsive and don't think before you do things like this. You need to learn to think ahead... that's one of the first things they drill into you at the academy. You graduated with honors so I know you're not stupid, however you seem to have a problem applying that knowledge to real life."

Ryan sighed too and nodded. "Yeah, real life is a lot different from book learnin', maybe I should resign."

"You're not resigning anything, Ry. No one is going to let you do that, especially not me. You're smarter than you give yourself credit for and I'm not letting that go to waste."

Ryan saw the look on Coral's face. He said quietly, "I'm sorry you're angry."

"I'm past angry, hon.  I'm disappointed, and concerned.  Right now my biggest concern is your propensity for giving up whenever things don't go your way.  And the fact that you keep putting yourself down.  I had planned to spank you for running off without a word to anyone, but I think you need more than that at this time."

Ryan looked at Coral. "All right...let's just get it over with."

"I'm not going to make it that easy for you, hon. I want you to tell me, what do you think would be a fair punishment for what you've done?  And lose the attitude, little boy. Don't you think you're in enough trouble?"

Ryan said, "A fair punishment? Spank me, ground me, make me write lines...make me stand in the corner for an hour."

Coral tilted his head as Ryan recited his list and once again tamped down his anger at the boy's attitude.   "Fine," He said in a matter of fact tone. "All of the above."

Ryan gulped and trembled. "You really mean that?"

"Well hon, if it hadn't been for your attitude I would have settled for one or two of your suggestions. But since you yourself said that all of those punishments were fair, then I'm going to take your input and act on it." Coral said as he reached over to pull Ryan over his lap.

Ryan began to cry, but allowed Coral to pull him down across his lap.

Coral clenched his jaw and resisted the urge to set Ryan back up on the couch, although he did decide against spanking the young man on the bare this time. He raised his hand and brought it down with a loud smack.

Ryan yelped and tried to not squirm. Coral was spanking hard. "Ow!"

Coral brought his hand down again and again, counting in his head. He thought that thirty smacks over a jean clad behind was fair and made sure that he made an impression on the young man over his lap.  His hand stung and his fingers were tingling by the time he'd finished.

Ryan yelped and squirmed at the sound spanking he had received. He was sobbing long before it ended.

Coral gently lifted Ryan up and pulled him down onto the couch so that he was lying on his side with his head in the big man’s lap. He rubbed the young man's back and wiped what he could of Ryan's face while the young man laid there, crying and spent.

Ryan said, "I'm sorry Coral...I won't do that again...I promise to think ahead."

"Shhh, it's all over now, hon.  This part at least. Breathe, hon." he said as he petted Ryan's sandy colored hair.

Ryan groaned. "Please Coral...this was enough." He sniffled.

"This was for running off without any thought, consideration or preparation." Coral said quietly. "What comes next is for putting yourself down, giving up, and mostly for the display of attitude you gave me. Understand?"

Ryan sighed. "Yes Sir." He said quietly.

"Then you can go stand in the corner for an hour. I'll set the timer. Stand straight and no fidgeting or talking." Coral directed. He hated to be so harsh on Ryan but he couldn't let the boy get away with disrespect.  By doing all of the things Ryan had said, he hoped to teach the boy to think before he spoke as well.

Ryan gingerly got up and went to stand in the corner as directed.

Coral set the timer, his appetite had disappeared as well, and the eggs and bacon were congealing into a greasy mess, so he tossed the remains of their breakfast and washed the plates in hot soapy water before putting them in the drainer. Then he sat down at the computer to do some work, and to think about what he could have Ryan write for his lines.  The boy had a serious lack of self-esteem and a bad habit of giving up very quickly on himself, so he had to find just the right message.  He took out a pen and some paper and gave the matter serious thought.

Ryan scowled, but stayed in the corner. He couldn't help but shift from time to time. He was getting tired of standing in the corner.

Coral had decided on a quote he'd heard a long time ago just as the timer went off. "Ry, you can come out of the corner, then I want you to sit at the table. I have your first set of lines to write." He said as he wrote the line neatly across the page before placing it on the kitchen table.

Ryan looked at the hard kitchen chair and bit his lip. He eased himself down onto it with a wince. "What am I supposed to write?" He asked.

Coral placed the paper in front of Ryan and turned it so that he could see the quote.  'It's not what you are that is holding you back, it's what you think you are not.'

Ryan looked at Coral. "What does it mean?"

"I want you to think about it while you write it and tell me what you think it means. And don't tell me you're stupid, because you're not. Just think about it as you write it." Coral responded.

Ryan sighed and nodded. "Yes Sir."

"When you think you understand what it means, then you can stop and we'll talk about it."

Ryan began to write the lines neatly. He could write neatly as he kept the records for the firing range well and in proper order. Ryan nodded. "Yes Coral."

After writing about four pages worth of lines he looked up at Coral.

"Why did you stop?" Coral asked. "Do you want to discuss the meaning of what you've been writing?"

Ryan nodded. "Yes please."

"So tell me, what does that line mean to you?"

Ryan said, "If I think badly, then I'll be bad?"

"Not really, hon, at least not in those words. Think." Coral stressed the last word. "You're not bad, so that doesn't even come into the equation."

Ryan frowned. "If I think bad then I won't be able to do anything?"

 Coral sighed. He walked over to the table and saw the sheets of neatly written lines but it was obvious that the point of the line wasn't getting through to the boy.

Ryan sighed. "I guess I'll just write it some more. Maybe somewhere along the line it will make sense to me."  He picked up the pen and began writing again.  'It's not what you are that is holding you back, it's what you think you are not.'

"It basically means that you are better than you think. It means that you need to believe in yourself and stop doubting yourself so fiercely."

Ryan bit his lip and nodded. "So if I think well of myself, then I'll believe in myself?"

Coral smiled a little. "I don't mean getting a big head, but you doubt yourself too strongly. I'm not sure what makes you think you're stupid or unworthy, all I know is that you believe it, and it's not true. Believe in yourself and other people will believe in you as well. I believe in you."  Coral said as he sat down next to Ryan and put one large hand over Ryan's smaller one.

Ryan smiled as he listened to Coral's words and got up and hugged him. "You always have Coral and I love you for that. I'll work on believing in myself more, but I can't promise to be perfect."

"There is no such thing as perfection, and I wouldn't expect it of you any more than you expect if of me, hon.  That wouldn't be fair to you."  Coral replied, hugging the young man to him.

Ryan snuggled into the hug and nodded. "All right, I promise to try my best, but you may need to remind me once in a while."

"I can do that." Coral smiled. "Now, are you ready for your next set of lines?"

Ryan looked at Coral. "Next set? How many sets are you goin' to make me write?" He asked with a pout.

"As many as it takes to get my points across. This first one was about self-esteem, this next one is about giving up every time things go wrong."

Ryan sighed. "All right."

Coral looked at the forlorn looking young man. "It's close to lunch time. Want to take a break and have something to eat?" He asked with a smile.

Ryan nodded. "Yes, that would be good I think."

Coral hugged the young man to him. "What are you in the mood for?"

“A sandwich and a glass of milk will do."

"Then sandwiches it is." Coral said with a grin, getting up to take cold cuts, lettuce and tomato out of the fridge to begin making lunch.

Ryan took the opportunity to give his sore bottom a rest and a good rub.  "You spank hard Coral." He complained.

"Did I get my point across?" Coral asked.

Ryan pouted. "Yes Sir."

"And despite the pain in your backside, do you feel better for it? Do you still feel any guilt? Are you still stressed out over what happened?"

Ryan thought about it and then said, "I do feel better and no guilt."

Coral leaned across the table and kissed Ryan on the forehead. "Then it did as it was supposed to do. Let's hope we never have to do it again. Or at least, not for a long time."

Ryan wrinkled his nose and nodded. "I'm with you on that."

Coral smiled and kissed Ryan on the nose. "Is there anything else you want to talk about before you start the next set of lines?"

Ryan bit his lip. "Umm...I guess these things come from my never being good enough and no matter what I did it wasn't ever right so I'd just give up."

"First of all, whoever told you you weren't good enough didn't know what they were talking about.  Look at you.  You graduated top of your class at the academy, you own and run a firing range where it is your job to teach other people gun safety and to qualify cops who are older than you are.  Those are accomplishments to be proud of.  As far as never being right... or doing anything right, that's a load of bull pucky." Coral said with a little asperity, which he assured Ryan was not aimed at him.  "That's where this next set of lines comes in handy.  But you can do them tomorrow before your shift since you're going to be grounded for the next week. You'll have plenty of time to do a set of lines each day since all you'll be doing is eating, sleeping, working and staying in the house. Clear?"

Ryan's green eyes widened and he bit his lip. "Yes Sir, I understand but what about Cas?  He needs me?"

"Let's get these dishes cleared up." Coral smiled, glad that Ryan wasn't going to fight him on the matter.  “You may still visit Cas and help feed him.  It’s important that he can bond with you, however, I’m sure Shorty is busy with the twins and Bo so you can visit your little angel tomorrow.”

Ryan nodded. "Thanks Coral, I don’t want him to forget me." He began to clear away some of the dishes.

Coral pulled the young man into a hug. "Have I told you today how proud I am of you?"

Ryan snuggled into the hug and shook his head. "No, you were mad."

"Well I'm not mad anymore, and all that is behind us, understood? The matter has been taken care of."

Ryan smiled. "Yes, I do."

Coral disengaged from the hug and turned to pick up the utensils and used napkins. "I know I said you could do the next set of lines tomorrow, but I'd like you to write them at least once while I do the dishes." He said, turning to look over his shoulder at Ryan.

Ryan said, "All right...I'll write them twice."

Coral cleared the table and brought another page to Ryan. "Here, you can start this while I clean up."

Across the top of the page were these words:   

'Don't let today's troubles bring you down.  Don't let life's obstacles keep you from trying.

Don't let your fears keep you from dreaming. Don't give up for any reason. Believe in yourself.'

Ryan smiled. "At least this one I don't have to figure out."

Coral smiled back and put an arm around his boy. "As long as you let the words sink in. Now get writing." He said, giving Ryan a quick hug before turning back to the sink and doing the dishes.

With a much lighter heart Ryan got to work on writing the lines.